I agree with Paul. We are experiencing an emotional rollercoaster. One day I am a dope designer. The next hour I feel like shit. I am always second guessing my abilities, talent and skill. I feel ashamed for what work I have but sometimes I feel proud—it all depends on the context in which I evaluate myself. Anyhow, I suffer from design bi-polarism.
People often mistaken me in class for being some hot shot guy, when I will freely and openly admit to being the most self-conscious designer in the class. I think it has something to do with how people misconstrue my ambitions with cockiness or over confidence. I don’t gloat. I set a high bar for myself but I don’t talk down on people or talk down on myself when I present solid work. Basically, I only bitch about being a bi-polar designer to Kate and Rob
The only time I talk at school, now, is if I am goofing off or during design crit. I’m quite disconnected right now. When it all comes down to it. my true passion is to become a designer, design author and design educator and the path I am pursuing and the things that I am doing, at the time, seem relevant. In fact, this semester I am spending a little more than half of my time studying graphic design than designing. That’s 18–20 hours split in half.