I feel much more alive when I am zombified. I feel much more alive when I am productive. These are times when I truly feel creative and rich of ideas—much like Jimmy Page on acid when he’s writing some truly amazing shit. Yeah, it’s that; minus the drugs. I feel high when I am not fully conscious and when I refuse to let my mind rest. I’m not enjoying myself when I am attuned to everything. I prefer thinking, visualizing, experiencing the abstract concepts of anything and everything around me.
When I am zombified, I think of things in the inside, the outside, the side, in diagonals, inverted, exploded. I miss these highs. I used to feel like this when I created some truly unique guitar sounds when I experimented with pedals, knobs, tone and volume. I know I sound like I’m on something but it’s seriously just writing and thinking and refusing to let my mind rest. I haven’t felt this good since last semester. I’d adopt those lack-of-sleep habits in an instant if it didn’t tear me up every last two weeks before school ends.
Daytime sucks anyhow. I’ve always been a vampire.