I am excited to see my cousins who I haven’t seen in years. It’s like we never grew apart. I am not ready to say goodbye to Uncle Raymond. I feel like I lost a huge chunk of my childhood. He was one of several uncles who raised me. He was my disciplinarian uncle when I was a hyper little brat. He always put everybody else ahead of him. Unfortunately, that’s also what took him.
It’s so easy to isolate memories that involve just him. He was a regular in my life. He’s also my godfather. He is one of 14 siblings. He’s the first to go. I have extreme anxiety issues as of lately. The burial is next Tuesday. It’s tough balancing life and school. They used to be so well integrated. I spend half of my time in class reminiscing. I sleep less. I honestly have no idea how I can take up all these projects. Somehow, I am not falling behind. I’m proud of that, but I’m pretty bummed about everything else.
Life hit hard this year. I’m just a zombie. My subconscious is what has been driving me lately and there’s about a million other things going on in school. Fortunately, I do not have an ounce of regret about taking on any of these projects. But I have no idea what I am talking about now. Oops.